The Jitters Are Gone And I Am Strangely Calm

[queenoftheskies]

Which I find fascinating.

The past few weeks, I've been very antsy, very nervous about finishing Ancient Secrets.

Why? I think maybe because I didn't think I could make it all come together.

Maybe there was something else. A fear that the rough draft wouldn't be something I could salvage.

Maybe there was more. All I know is that it was a little frightening.

But, yesterday I wrote without even thinking about it because I was on a roll that wouldn't be denied, caught up with the characters in the story and all that was important was writing what was in my heart and my mind.

Today, I haven't written as much, but I'm still writing, working on bridging scenes mostly, that I skipped until I was better acquainted with the characters.

I do have two important scenes I intend to finish today. The confrontation between Lilli and Agnes that includes Agnes' death (that Lilli is later accused of) and the remainder of Lilli's battle with Meliathis at the end.

After that, a few more odds and ends to write and a few scenes I left off at climaxes because I knew they'd be very easy to come back to on that last day and finish with much enthusiasm.

But, I'm not nervous. I'm not afraid. I know that I will have words on paper/computer. Those words can be changed and shifted and deleted and manipulated into something I can be proud of.

And, if I don't have the ability to turn it into something publishable at this point, it will wait patiently for me to return to it until I do have that ability.

But, it will be finished. And, I will be filled with emotion. And, maybe even shed tears of joy because this is something I've wanted for so long.

It's almost finished. And, it feels so alive.

Comments

[queenoftheskies.livejournal.com]

Thank you. I've always just been stuck at the scared before and I must say I much prefer this feeling. It's...nice. :)