Taking a Deep Breath

[queenoftheskies]

And, hoping that many things will resolve themselves today.

It would be nice to be able to relax and concentrate completely on writing again.

I've been throwing out some words, but my word counts have been WAY off lately. My concentration has been way off, too.

Which, of course, is why I asked all you folks yesterday how angst in your lives affected your writing.

It seems like, since early February, my life has been one constant source of angst or one disaster after another.

I got to where I held everything inside because I felt there was nowhere to turn, and that just made everything get worse and worse. Don't get me wrong. I had a wonderful LJ friend who kept checking to make sure I was okay and offered to let me unload on her...but she has so much going on in her life right now that it just didn't seem right. So, I tried not to unload and maybe just let off a tiny bit of steam a little at a time. I hope she knows how much I appreciate her concern and her willingness to listen. I've told her...and always appreciate it LOTS.

And, the beginning of this week, I think I was FINALLY improving. I felt better, I was writing more...and then the sh*t hit the fan again. Sigh.

I think there's no room for a "live and let live" person in this world. Folks think that, if you're non-confrontational, you have to roll over and go belly-up instead of having opinions and trying to do what's right. Everyone else is always right, you know?

I run into this at work, I run into this outside of work. Sometimes, I don't understand why folks just can't get along. I don't want to be a hermit. I want to be social. I like people...but, I guess that's part of my downfall. I'm always willing to give people the benefit of the doubt, I'm always willing to reach out and help when I can, so they're constantly using me over and over and hurting me...and I just keep getting up and dusting myself off and letting them do it again.

In all aspects of my life.

I guess I'm just stupid.