Deep Breaths

Another day.

Another day down when it's over.

Then only three more days left at the current job.

I can do that. Even if they give me trouble again today.

I can.

I slept pretty well last night. Maybe not enough hours, but I dreamed and it was good. Kitties even stayed off the top of me until right before time to get up.

Feeling a little more optimistic today. Payday and end of job in sight.

I need to get to work on whichever screenplay I decide to submit next week. It's to the production company that almost bought Atonement. I considered doing some revising and giving it another shot since they've made a few different types of movies since then, but I'm not sure. I have other screenplays to choose from, too. I just have to decide what fits their needs best. I also get to submit two additional loglines to them. Decisions...decisions...

Need to get focused for the summer. I intentionally avoided goals for this month, other than trying to hit 45,000 words of writing, which is a step up from last month, and an average of 1,500/day.

But, as I ease into the other job and find myself with more time, I hope to get my brain back into more productive/finish up novels/think about marketing mode.

Last year was a really great year for me as far as productivity and finishing novels went, in spite of the old company crashing down around my ears and major financial problems and uncertainty from the resulting company bankruptcy. I was HUGELY productive.

Which just goes to show that working for the new company (that bought the old company) has brought with it a different type of stress that just isn't conducive for writing. I can feel what it is, but I don't quite know how to explain it yet. And, of course, most recently, it has taken away what little time I have.

I can't blame all of my floundering on work, though. There was a lot of emotional turmoil and disappointment earlier in the year. February, March, and April were pretty much lost months for me. Months that I hope to never repeat. Months that make me wonder how much trust I can really put in people again. I got betrayed, knocked down, stomped upon both in real life and in writerly terms as well.

It's taken me a while to really get my head on straight again. I do have days of very clear focus and intent, wonderful inspiration, and many words. And, I know I'm working my way back to that. Sometimes, I'm just impatient and want it all to come back now.

It will come back and I satisfy myself with knowing that. For a while, I really wondered if I was broken beyond repair.

But, I'm not. I'll get better. It just takes some work and some time and things will ultimately be okay. :)

I guess I must hit the road. Only today and three more days of commute. Not too bad in the grand scheme of things, eh?

Hope everyone has a wonderful day!

OMG...FUN!!!

I can't remember the last time I had such a pleasant surprise or so much fun.

This evening, when I went to pick up daughter and youngest son at the high school, the drama teacher invited us out to dinner (his treat) with him, plus three other students.

We went to this AWESOME deli not too far from the school, and all seven of us crammed into this HUGE booth.

Food was EXCELLENT, kids ate dessert, too. And, we sat for HOURS talking drama and school and screenwriting and he told me again that he'll take some screenplays to his agent for feedback and possible submission to contacts of hers.

And, the boys (three total, including my son) sang musicals and we laughed and laughed and laughed (not at the boys' singing...they were actually pretty good) so much that my sides hurt.

And, we didn't leave the restaurant until about 8:00 (we were there like three hours), when we were all starting to get pretty droopy.

But, OMG, it was sooo much fun.

Now we're talking about meeting for chicken and wild rice soup at Millie's on Saturday and doing it again in a mini version. (Less of us this time around.)

Obviously, there was no time to type in what I wrote out by hand today. I'll do that tomorrow.

Good night everybody. Sleep tight.