Thoughtful

I must find a new job. Not only is work killing me, but it demoralizes me as well. I watch the horrible things that happen, the terrible attitudes, the owner not caring how he hurts people around him these days, no concern for the employees...only how much money he can take out of the company. And, I have to figure how to keep the blasted place in business...just for a stinking paycheck.

But, as a single parent, I have to have that paycheck, so I feel that I'm trapped, and I'm not quite sure what to do about it.

But, I watch the effects on my health, I watch my inability to sleep through the night, I watch it get harder and harder to drag words out of my imagination as I write in the evenings. Mornings wouldn't be as bad if I had more time and didn't have to rush.

But, perhaps part of my problem with writing is work, too...or, rather, what work does to me. I miss the great, visual cinemas my imagination used to provide me with. Now, I get photos...snapshots...but I'm missing some of the emotion I had once upon a time.

Must find a way to work within these limited abilities for the time being. Must figure out something to do about work and a new job soon.

Beginning of the End 1052 words for the day

140,218 total words to date

Still hoping to finish this monster this month. Then, there will be lot of pruning and fertilizing and heavy work to do on it.

But, even if I never have the talent to get it published, which, of course, would make me very sad, at least it'll be a complete work, and that part will make me happy.