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Usually nothing happens this early in the morning, but I'm all excited about the feedback I got from Marc Rosen at Heydey Films on my screenplay.

This was a learning opportunity, included in a Screenwriters Online class. A chance for us to learn with an opinion directly from an entertainment industry exec. Marc was brutally honest with everyone and Heyday Films is the production company that made the Harry Potter Films, so I feel like the feedback came from a good source.

I was pleased that the problems he pointed out were not serious, things I can fix easily, and that I had no plot or structure problems. I received some really good feedback from a contest a couple of years ago on this same screenplay and, while they didn't see the same problems he did, I feel like I can balance his comments with theirs to make this screenplay more marketable. I also won a contest with it a couple of years back, so I knew it wasn't a complete waste of time and typing. But, it's nice to hear various opinions and be able to get a well-rounded view of a piece.

Feedback:

ATONEMENT by Janice Smith

I think this is a really cool idea, and I like the way in (it reminds
me of LONG KISS GOODNIGHT). It is over-written with dialogue and
exposition at the moment, and feels like a first draft that could use
a pass to tighten it up. In terms of the marketplace, I think people
would respond to the writing, but the premise may be tough to sell.
It is hit-or-miss with superpower stuff because of the resurgence of
comics, HARRY POTTER, etc.

I read 75 pages of this, then scanned the rest. Not something I
would personally make, but after a polish (many scenes are too talky)
it might interest someone.


Marc Rosen

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