Glorious

[queenoftheskies]

I don't know how else to describe the past couple of days.

There's a sense of freedom. I'm not sure where it came from. Perhaps from leaving work, but I don't think so since I've been worried about covering rent and going in on Tuesday to see what the receiver wants. But...maybe?

Perhaps from trying really hard to analyze my writing life and allow myself freedom there. Freedom to write what's in my mind and heart. Freedom to make mistakes. Freedom to write crap. Freedom just to write for a while, until my muse is ready to buckle down and get back to work.

I think all the crap at work and the pain from some of the critiques affected her even more than it outwardly affected me. Because...after all...she's the REAL me. The me that's sensitive, the me that creates and dreams and loves the writing so much.

And, I think I've come to some pretty good realizations lately. I'm putting together some of them to post on my LJ over the next few days.

I hope these realizations are going to make me not only more productive, but more focused and goal-oriented, as well. Without killing myself. And, while working myself into a new job.

But, at any rate, I wrote today. And, that's good. Read some more on a writing book I bought myself for my birthday, too. And, that's good.

Going to have a boiled egg and then go to sleep. And, yes, that's good too. Resting is wonderful. It's something I really need.


Love Eternal 2,139 words today

5,741 total words to date

Comments

[navicat.livejournal.com]

I'm really glad to hear you're feeling well! And I hope you enjoy the relaxation. Hopefully some good can come out of all this :)

[dragovianknight.livejournal.com]

I think all the crap at work and the pain from some of the critiques affected her even more than it outwardly affected me.

That's because you're very good at hiding how you really feel, even from yourself...but you still feel it, even when you won't acknowledge it.

[java-fiend.livejournal.com]

I'm glad to hear that you've found some sort of peace, Janice. I most definitely think that your sense of freedom is from your writing breakthroughs, but it has got to be a load off your mind to leave that job, isn't it? Though you face some uncertainty and some difficult times ahead, not having that oppressive weight hanging over your head. Job uncertainty, your trying to care for others you work with while all around you is going to hell has got to take a toll on you.

Keep hanging in there, Janice. We're all pulling for you. I for one, can't wait to see what effect these life changes will have on your writing.

[queenoftheskies.livejournal.com]

There probably won't be writing for a while. I'm probably going to have to move out of state, so that's going to take a lot of packing and traveling and that kind of stuff.